When you read about those who have appeared before the courts breathe a sigh of relief – because you're (probably) committing crimes too.

In fact, we've compiled a list of offences that almost everyone will have committed at some point or other – without ever knowing they were crimes.

Some of the 'small' laws run from the mundane – not paying for a carrier bag at a self-service check-out, for example – to the... well, more mundane – such as not having a TVlicence.

But others are slightly weirder. And if you've ever been drunk in a pub before, then we're afraid to say you're guilty of at least one.

Here are our favourites:

  • Singing 'Happy Birthday' in a restaurant (as the song is copyrighted)
  • Swearing or gesturing at other drivers or road users
  • Annoying anyone by flying a kite
  • Beeping a horn for any reason other than alerting traffic
  • Vacuuming between the hours of 6pm and 8pm on a weekday, or 1pm and 8am on a weekend
  • Being drunk in the street, or in a pub and restaurant
  • Pocketing change when given the wrong amount
  • Disturbing people by ringing their doorbells or knocking on their doors and leaving before being answered
  • Using a fake name on the internet
  • Sticking a postage stamp upside down
  • Using someone else's Wi-Fi without them knowing
  • Throwing tree cuttings back over your neighbours' garden
  • Singing or chanting a crude football chant in the street
  • Parking opposite a junction
  • Parking without side lights on in a road where the speed limit is more than 30mph, facing away from traffic or outside of a designated parking space
  • Carrying wooden planks across a pavement
  • Beating or shaking any carpet, rug or mat in the street after 8am
  • Handling fish 'suspiciously'
  • Wearing armour while visiting Parliament
  • Standing sockless within 100 yards of the Queen