IT’S a truth universally acknowledged, is it not, that as soon as one area of your life goes swimmingly the rest of it falls into disarray. Well, as I have recently discovered, the same can apparently be said of planning a wedding.
Having made leaps and bounds in the getting-organised-in-time stakes (I’m talking a checklist table with columns for ordered/not ordered, paid for/not paid for and everything) I was beginning to feel quite calm about it all until last weekend.
Despite one small argument about money the other half seems quite happy to let me trundle on, apart from when he wants to make an opinion or when I ask for it, and discussions have reached a generally helpful and excited stage.
Ebay and I are now working hand in hand on an almost daily basis in order to stage this gig and (were I not already due to marry the love of my life) might just be embarking on the greatest love affair of all time. This month I attacked the fabric department with relish for favours and bridesmaids dresses and (almost) came up trumps on both. They have fabric shops that are on-line and that can send you samples in the post for free! Heaven, and soooo much easier than trawling the high-street (although probably not as local-business friendly as other things on the wedding list, like flowers and photography). So this is all fine, I’ve got things that need to be ordered/decided upon/completed/paid for by the end of the summer, things that need to be done by the end of the year, and things that just need to be done, all noted down on my fridge door to remind me. I’ve got things coming through the door on a daily basis, family members and friends on the look-out for goodness knows what and a general direction in which to work. Splendid.
Unfortunately I also have quite a large family and, hey presto, the first political saga has reared its ugly head - or the head (of the family) has reared the first political saga. Either way, I was mightily annoyed. Of course, this may just be something that applies to my family only (largely, I suspect, because due to many things the main players are mostly women) but some of us do have a tendency to interfere from time to time - such is the source of my despair. Basically, as previously mentioned, I decided to veto any grown-up bridesmaids in favour of baby ones, precisely because it made the process of picking them slightly less complicated and also because they are easier to dress. This has apparently gone down less well with the powers that be and one of them has decided to inform my teenage cousin that she will, in fact, not be a bridesmaid to stop any disappointment when the time comes. Well call me crazy but I reckon pointing out the fact that she is not joining us up the aisle might just cause more disappointment than less, don’t you think? Had I been given the chance, I’m sure I would have tactfully and rather less savagely broached the subject with her at some point. Fortunately for me the girl concerned is pretty cool, calm and mature for her age - and has also been a bridesmaid at least three times already - so I know there will be minimal fuss from her. It’s the fuss from the rest of them I’m finding difficult to stomach (there has now been a kind of rippled, domino affect between the dominant females in this little scenario that, shamefully, started from me). To top it all off the chosen ones haven’t even been informed yet, while I have been left to worry that the redundant cousin will tell one of the other ones by mistake (they’re only six - I can’t tell them yet as it’s too long to wait).
My friend told me someone she knows didn’t speak to her family and vice versa for a whole year because they weren’t seated near enough to the top table at the reception, which did make me feel slightly better about the whole thing.
We’re not even having a top table anyway....
* Tip - put lists on your cooker, fridge, bathroom door - wherever you will remember to look at them - with a ten-month/six-month/three-month timetable on to make sure you get things done on time.
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